Questions, answered.

AssAwards (assawards.com) is a satirical recognition platform where people nominate friends, family, and coworkers for certified roast titles like Smart Ass, Wise Ass, and 140+ others. The nominee receives a certified, shareable title card. The awards are jokes; the certification is very official.

Every AssAwards title is a real certified card with its own shareable page, and it can be ordered as a genuinely printed 8" x 10" certificate or a custom greeting card. The behavior being recognized is real too. That is rather the point.

Pick a title from the collection at assawards.com/gallery, click Nominate, name your nominee, and state your case. The whole thing takes about a minute. The nominee gets their certified award by email, or you get a private claim link if you want to hand it over in person.

Nominating someone is free. If you want to make it physical, a digital certificate is $4.79, a printed premium certificate is $19.99, and a custom greeting card starts at $12.00. Physical items ship USPS First Class for $4.17.

The nomination is certified and the nominee receives an email with their title card and your written case, or you receive a claim link to deliver yourself. They can share the award, order keepsakes, and, naturally, send one back.

AssAwards is sarcastic, not mean. The house rules: inclusive in the joke, confident but not arrogant, specific rather than vague. The best nominations are the ones the nominee frames. All rulings final.

AssAwards was established in 2025 and is a subsidiary of CEOdom, LLC. You can reach the committee at social@assawards.com.