Woke Ass

This ass has done the reading, all of it, and they need you to know that immediately. They will correct your language, your snack choice, and your entire worldview before the appetizers arrive, gently, sadly, from a great moral height. Every conversation is an opportunity for growth, specifically yours. They have a thread for that. They have unfollowed people for less. It is not that they are wrong, often they are painfully right, it is that they have turned being right into a full-contact sport and you did not sign the waiver. Exhausting, well-intentioned, and absolutely certain. The most enlightened person in the room, and they took attendance.