Sweet Ass

This ass will hand you a compliment so warm and a smile so genuine that you will not feel the knife go in until you are halfway home. They are kindness itself, right up until the precise moment they are absolutely not, delivered in the very same honeyed voice. 'Bless your heart' was invented by someone like this and weaponized by them. You will be roasted so politely that you will thank them for it on the way out. It is not two-faced, it is efficient. Why raise your voice when you can lower the boom with a term of endearment? Sugar on top, savage underneath, and sweet enough that no jury would convict.