Supplement Stack Ass

This ass takes thirty-four pills a day to optimize a body they rarely leave the house with. The counter is a pharmacy. Morning is a ceremony of capsules, each one researched, stacked, and timed, and eleven of them end in the letters i-n-e, which they will happily spell for you. They feel incredible, they report, though they felt fine before, and cannot isolate which of the thirty-four is responsible, so they take all thirty-four, forever, insured against a deficiency they do not have. A biohacker whose single greatest optimization would be a walk outside, unswallowed, in the actual sun.