Slow Ass

This ass cannot be rushed and has never once tried. They will process your question over the course of a full business week and deliver, eventually, the exact right answer, long after the conversation and possibly the building have moved on. Urgency bounces off them like rain off a rock. They take their time with everything, on principle, whether it is a text reply or an exit from a parking lot with cars waiting. It is not that they are behind. They are operating on a timeline of their own careful design, gloriously immune to yours. Good things come to those who wait. This ass is precisely why you are waiting.