Inside Scoop Ass

This ass knows something, and they need you to know that they know it, and that you never will. They are always in the loop, always just off a call they cannot discuss, always the keeper of information too sensitive to share but never too sensitive to hint at, endlessly. 'I can't say much, but...' is their entire personality. The access may be real or entirely imagined; the point is the power of the withholding, the small private thrill of being the one who knows. A gatekeeper to secrets that may not even exist, forever dangling a scoop just out of reach, feeding on your curiosity and offering, in exchange, absolutely nothing.