Carnivore Ass

This ass eats meat. Only meat. They have looked at the entire plant kingdom and declared it a scam, an anti-nutrient plot, a leafy conspiracy against their ancestral vigor. They will eat a steak for breakfast and tell you about it. Fiber is a myth invented by cereal companies. Salad is grazing, and they are not livestock. They feel amazing, they insist, from behind eyes that have not seen a vegetable since spring, and they will monologue about their bloodwork with the fervor of the converted. A lion, they believe. A man eating his fourth ribeye alone in a kitchen, technically.